Hello. It's me again...I haven't written in well over a year but social distancing has driven me to talking to arachnids so here we are. (I'll rant/update about my reason for being such a flaky biscuit in another post though.) All my life I have been well aware that I am an introverted, slightly anti-social, sleepy homebody. Social distancing should have been a breeze!
One month in and I am ready to be anywhere but the cozy abode that I have created for myself. Until people can move around safely and the world starts making sense walk, with me through my daydreams of life on the other side.
1. I am getting the most expensive massage available.
I am stressed the entire fuck out. My neck and head hurt constantly since I started working from home. It could also be a combination of botched at home workout attempts and several mini break-downs but who knows. Regardless of the reason why, I want to be tenderized like a steak. I want to be beaten like a rug. I want to experience that vibrating voice thing from them chopping at my back furiously. I deserve it.
2. A major primping session will be had.
I just moved to a new city and was in the process of figuring out a new nail salon, waxing place, threading place, etc. I was even ready to make the hour drive to a hair salon I had been interested in for a while to get a much needed trim. So I'm gonna need to get ALL that taken care of asap. I'm getting the most expensive gel pedicure and an hour long facial, too. My 2020 will officially start after this is over and for the first time I will be partaking in the 'new year, new me' stuff.
3. The gym will be my first, my last and my everything.
I already mentioned my botched at home workout attempts, I spent some time tripping over a jump rope in the name of cardio and quickly realized that being the owner of a blessed chest doesn't agree with that much impact. I need the stair-master and stationary bikes. Say it with me: LOW IMPACT. Even my double bra trick didn't save my girlies. Let's not even get me started on when I pulled muscles in my armpits and thought I was about to be out this bitch. Also, I miss lifting weights and burning 800 calories a day and being satisfyingly sweaty. I promise not to skip another cardio session or upper body day again if they just let me in.
4. I'll be making a trip back to Mississippi.
I went home for sadder reasons in February so at least I got to see my family and give them hugs prior to all this happening, I realized pretty early on just how much I wish I could be quarantined with my family and at least be able to wave to my friends. My nephew took his first steps during all this and I don't know when I'll be able to chase him around and enjoy that. I don't think I've had a hug in like a month and really just need to go have a good cry on my dad's shoulder and sit on my mama's lap while she calls me rusty.
5. I'm getting a therapist.
I had some stuff I needed to work through prior to all this but ohmygawd social distancing has revealed some other stuff that I was not ready to address without the presence of a licensed individual that could help me not spiral. I need to talk about my life choices and the people I invite into my orbit. An entire month may need to be devoted to how working from home has taken a toll on me because baybehhhh...my head is a mess right now. Shambles.
6. I'm changing my phone number.
Those last two were a little heavier and I just can't end on a sad note, doesn't sit right with my spirit. I was already planning on changing my number once I got settled but Miss Rona snatched that plan away. I've had the same number since I got my first phone at 13 and I always told myself once I started getting my life together I'd change it so I could have more control over the people that have access to me. My mama has always told me that I make myself too accessible to other people and I never understood what she meant until I got older. I'm perfectly okay with having the smallest contact list on the planet if it's full of people that care about me. I appreciate those people so much more after having dealt with all of this.
So that's what I plan on doing when this is all over and I have to keep faith that this will end sooner rather than later. Please stay safe and do whatever you need to do to protect your mental health. I'd love to hear what's on your list or even just how you're doing during all this down below. Theres' also nothing but space and opportunity in any of my DMs if you just need someone to talk to in order to kill some time. (Don't be gross though because my ass gets fatter every time I block someone, so my thumb stays ready.)